The Kindness Switch
This 5-year-old found hers in an unusal location
Ramona (5) started kicking and hitting. She fought everything and everyone. Her three siblings refused to play with her.
This wasn’t just a phase.
Eyes closed, we went looking for where this was coming from.
As is often the case, her feelings were red. Ramona found them everywhere. In her arms, her hands, her legs, her feet.
Dozens of little angry faces, like masks, covering her from the inside.
She peeled them off one by one and threw them in the bin.
Then she visualized a pressure washer and blasted away everything that was left. She loved this.
She laughed loudly.
That laugh - we used it. She laughed into her hands, caught the laughter, and pressed it into her body. We did this over and over until she was full of it. Laughter and joy, packed into every corner.
Then I asked her:
Where is your kindness switch?
She didn’t hesitate for a second.
She lifted her foot in the air, pointed at her heel, and said:
“Here. Right here in my heel. That’s the kindness switch.”
It was on now, she confirmed.
She skipped out of the session. Literally skipped.
She chose a necklace with a white stone as a gift on the way out. White, she explained to her mother, means being kind like an angel.
I’ve worked with hundreds of children. I still think about that heel.
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